Culture has always been a powerful parent. Sculpting our families and our community, it exerts a huge influence over the way we think and the way we act.

Over recent years huge leaps in technology and mass communication have groomed many people to the point where they can no longer discern their values or way of life from the values or lifestyle imposed by their cultural influences. And while many aspects of our culture are incredibly advanced, some – like the gun culture, celebrity culture, the blame culture, Size-0 culture and the consumer culture – can be seen to be imbalanced, misguided and at worse, destructive.

If you would like to make a difference in the world and help to build a more balanced, positive culture, try starting on your own doorstep. By taking response-abilty, identifying your beliefs and values then focusing on all the things that do work about your relationships and your family, your home life will be lifted. Problems and challenges won’t vanish, but by learning from your mistakes and focusing on what you want, your family can become a little pocket of positive culture that acts as one building block towards a better world.

For families who want to bring out the best in their home culture and do bit in planting seeds for a better future, try these 6 Fun Ways To Get Your Family Culture Flourishing. Please note that these steps are designed for families with pre-teens!

1 Try Switching Off The Telly-Culture And Take A Magical Trip Instead

Every family already has its own unique culture. Influenced by parent’s backgrounds, family traditions and the wider community, families naturally develop their own set of rules, habits, activities and attitudes. To identify your family’s heartfelt values, gather everyone together and imagine you are setting sail to a tropical island where your family will build a brand new township.

• How will people treat each other in this new town – lovingly, respectfully?
• What qualities do people display?
• How do people communicate? How do they listen?
• What do people do for fun?
• Is the island treated in ways to ensure that it stays beautiful and healthy?

Instead of telling your children your ideas, listen to what they come up with and discuss their thoughts with them afterwards. Not only will this help them to develop their own thinking skills, but it also creates partnership and gives them ownership over the new, positive culture they are helping to create.

2 Capture Your Culture On A Life Map

When members of a family are displaying their highest qualities and values, many of the usual issues and disputes will disappear. To keep your kids (and grown-ups) focused on being their best selves, download a Life Mapping template then summon up a powerful image of your best family culture.

Together, create a central image that represents your new, positive culture and then create a simple “I am . . . .” statement to describe these qualities, attitudes and values. For example “I am (as in each one of us is) fun, creative and loving.”

Next fill in each of the outer circles, of mental, emotional, physical, material, social and spiritual capturing an image and word that describes the qualities your family aspire to live. Once complete, get everyone to sign the family Life Map and then put it in a place that it can be seen daily.

3 Ditch The Blame-Culture And Get Response-Able

Whether the coffee was too hot, the pavement too uneven or your glasses blurred your vision so you didn’t see the step, we can always find someone (or something) to blame. Not limited to the outside world, families are quite established in their finger-pointing careers too!

There is a moment in between something causing you stress and your knee jerk reaction to it that, if captured, can be your biggest gift. This moment is where you can learn to practise the art of response-ability. Your choice in that moment, how you decide to handle the situation, is what will turn it from being another “telling off” or row into a magical opportunity to live your highest qualities. By taking response-ability for ourselves as adults and parents, we create a powerful role model for our children to do the same.

Make being response-able fun by asking each family member to become a Response-ability Coach. As a Response-ability Coach your job is to notice when someone is in the “blame-culture” and then lift that person out by asking an empowering question such as;

“What could be the best possible outcome for this situation?” and “how can choosing your response now make this happen?”

4 Borrow Everyone Else’s Best Bits

Explore the cuisines, music, life styles, attitudes and beliefs of other cultures. It’s through the sharing of knowledge and the development of ideas that humankind has evolved to where it is today. Relevant attitudes and pearls of wisdom that are lacking in our own culture can be found across the globe.

For example, in most third world countries nothing is wasted and everything is reused, remade and recycled – the sort of behaviour we are now striving to display in the West. In France families see meal times as precious opportunities to bond, communicate, listen and laugh.

5 Rename A Weekday Celebration Day

When you and your family are celebrating you know that things are going well. And the more things are going well in your family, the better everyone will feel about themselves, their lives and each other. The happier people are in themselves, the more they communicate well, give to and support each other.

Change the name of one of the weekdays to Celebration Day and use this day for each family member to choose something to feel grateful for. Showing your children how to feel grateful and celebrate what they have in their lives will help them to establish the habit of focusing on what they want . . . which will naturally steer them towards finding more things to celebrate and feeling even better about themselves!

6 How About Throwing Away The Consumer-Culture And Giving The Gift That Matters?

We all want our children kitted out with roller blades, nice clothes, bikes, toys and entertainment but are these things really going to guarantee them a successful, happy life?

Every parent has fallen into the trap of buying their child “things” in a demonstration of love, but the real foundation of a happy, successful life, both in the home and beyond, are the qualities of character and state of mind that you teach your family.

By demonstrating those qualities and creating a home culture in which everyone can thrive, you will gift your family more joy and happiness and you will in turn gift our world with happier, more joyful people.

Why not add a new dimension to your Celebration Day by having a family meal where everyone can take turns to say what they appreciate and love about each other? You could relay an anecdote about something that has happened during the week, or just offer a quality you love about the other people in your home.

By Bethan Stritton